Evolution Encourages Moral Decay, Tooth Decay

As many of you know I previously debunked the theory of evolution via the existence of dick-plant. Apparently, this irrefutable proof of an Intelligent Designer named God has not been sufficient to turn back the tide of “scientists” and their so called “logical” and “rational thought” and “not stupidity.” Pity.

Fortunately, there are those that have taken up the mantle of not only proving evolution to be a lie, but also proving that evolution leads to increased crime, murder, immorality, prostitution, drug use, rape, and gingivitis. These heroes are the winners of the Answers in Genesis “Research Challenge Contest for 2007″.

If you’d like a summary of the accomplishments of the winners I’ll refer you to Zeno’s excellent coverage of the winning essays. Instead I want to take a moment to praise the brilliance of the grand prize winner, the young Karin Hutson, who’s essay titled “Evolution of Ethics: How the biology class undermines Morality 101″ has earned her a $50,000 scholarship to Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University. There she will learn about how ridiculously awesome Jesus is, how stupid Evolutionists are, and hopefully how to correctly spell the name “Karen.”

I marvel at the analytic prowess Karin shows in her essay. Karin shows insight into the issues surrounding the evolution lie and has concluded how best to properly attack it. She writes of her failed attempt to brainwash share God’s love with a fellow student,

Soon after that frustrating encounter, Answers in Genesis published Evolution Exposed. The book not only offered answers for my friend but it also taught me that the origins debate is not solved through facts alone.

Indeed, if facts alone could solve the origins debate then there wouldn’t be an origins debate. Sure, yeah, that’s because Creationists don’t actually have any facts to use, but luckily in place of facts they can use self-righteousness and unquestionable personal moral authority.

Ever since the Scopes Trail, one of the strongest arguments against Darwin’s theory has been evolution’s failure to uphold morality.

So true. The Scopes Trial in 1925, in which the a high school biology teacher was arrested for daring to poison young children with the hate that is evolution, instigated widespread moral decay. Nothing good has happened to the world since then. Granted, civil rights was sorta good. Equal rights for woman wasn’t too shabby either. An increased general public concern for the welfare people and animals was probably for the better too. Also, Medicare was a plus. That whole New Deal thing. Defeating the Nazis. Sesame Street. Fall of Apartheid. Ending Communism. Jefferson Airplane. My birth.

Karin continues her illumination by pointing to how, really, this is all just a matter of different strokes for different folks. She writes,

Creationists examine fossils and point back thousands of years to the worldwide flood explained in the Bible, while evolutionists look at the same fossils and point back millions of years.

Indeed, and since neither side has any facts or rational data, such as say carbon dating, to back up their claims we must naturally assume that Evolutionists are wrong and Creationists are right. Naturally.

Finally, Karin hammers home the point of how ridiculously unmoral evolution is.

But if evolution is true, why fool ourselves with moral restrictions? Rather we should live our evolutionary life to its full emptiness.

Just follow Karin’s amazing logic: The fact that evolutionary theory says nothing about things like morality or justice or current affairs means that evolution thinks those things don’t exists. Therefore if you believe in evolution you must also believe those things don’t exist. Therefore, evolution is wrong. Holy shit! No, I mean that literally. It’s like God is shitting in my hand. It all makes sense now.

The genius of Karin’s argument is that she never deals with those pesky “facts” that, you know, totally support modern evolutionary theory. Instead she blames evolution for everything that’s wrong in the world. This is awesome. How can you counter that? You can’t, because evolutionary theory has nothing to do with morality. It’s powerless to stop such a line of attack. It is absolutely clear that Karin deserved to win the grand prize.

If you still convinced that evolution isn’t real I leave you with one final notion to consider: You should most certainly want evolution to not be real. Why? Karin is going to grow up to (most likely) have a litter of little Karins that she will teach about science just as she has been taught, which will in turn grow up to have their own litter of sub-Karins which they shall teach, and so on and so forth. If evolution actually happens, then eventually the world will be full of Karins. Just think about that.

*** I found out about this whole ridiculous affair due to the excellent blogging of Christopher O’Brien of Northstate Science, who keeps abreast of these sorts of things. Personally, I have no idea how he can stomach reading about, blogging about, and exposing crap like this, but I’m nevertheless glad that someone is. ***

About Nima

Hi, my name is Nima Yousefi and this is my frickin’ sweet website. I’m not an expert in any particular field, however I do own a computer and an Internet connection, and therefore naturally assume that my random thoughts and opinions are important and that the lives of everyone on Earth would be improved dramatically by reading those random thoughts and opinions.
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4 Responses to Evolution Encourages Moral Decay, Tooth Decay

  1. Zeno says:

    “If evolution actually happens, then eventually the world will be full of Karins. Just think about that.”

    Ah, but there will be variation among the Karins and some of them will turn out to be evolutionists — no doubt to the great distress of nth-great grandma Karin. Creationists won’t be able to breed as true as they hope.

  2. Nima says:

    Again, Evolutionists try and muddy the glorious waters of God’s grace with their so-called “logic” and “reason” and “facts” and “science” and “proper diction and spelling.” I noticed you also tried to slip some math in there. Insidious, diabolical math. Well played, sir.

  3. Justin says:

    You say Karin will have a litter of little Karin’s, but I feel you should call them what they are…”crotchfruit”

    As in Karin has a whole bunch of crotchfruit and little Karina is the freshest of them all.

  4. Extremely nice blog post. I recently discovered your web blog and wanted to say that I have genuinely really liked checking your current content. In fact I will be subscribing to your feed.

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