When Apple announced the iPhone a tiny question popped up in the back of my equally tiny mind: how long would it take before Apple started screwing its customers like all the other companies in the cell phone racket? Answer: two months.
John Gruber brutally analyzes the issue of how Apple is handling ringtones in a post titled (absolutely appropriately) “The Ringtone Racket.” I agree with his overall message and his points about what’s wrong with the entire ringtone industry, but I take issue with him when he says:
The whole ringtones racket is predicated on the notion that ringtones are something different than songs. This notion is bullshit.
It isn’t bullshit at all. Ringtones might be music, but they’re not songs. I’ll go on a limb here and guess that your home phone doesn’t play a song when you have a call — it probably has a very specific ring. Marimba, the default iPhone ringtone sounds nice, but by no means would I call that a song. Nor would I call another iPhone ringtone, “Old Phone” (which sounds like a old rotary phone ringer), a song. While some of the ringtones that come with the iPhone (as with other cell phones) are designed to mimic songs, they aren’t actually songs. They are exactly what we call them, tones.
What John is talking about are ringsongs: songs that are used in place of ringtones. You might think making this distinction is nitpicking, but I think the distinction is very important. Creating a ringtone means thoughtfully composing a piece of music that contains the right balance of alarm and intrigue, while creating a ringsong means putting Chingy on your phone. One requires artistry and talent, the other requires being tone-deaf. Not the same thing.
I’m bringing this up not to be a cock, but because I love ringtones, and hate ringsongs. Yeah, its fun to have the “Knight Rider” theme song on your phone for a while (ahem… not that I would ever put the “Knight Rider” theme on a cell phone…) but it gets old real fast, and also everyone around you is clued in that you’re a moron. I think a good ringtone would be worth 99 cents. Hell, a really brilliant ringtone might actually be worth the $2.50 John says others are charging for ringtones. I want to encourage talented musicians to compose quality ringtones. I want them to know that there are people out there who appreciate what they’re doing. It is unfortunate that ringsongs are easier and cheaper to produce (since Fergie’s already making music, regardless of what any of us — or even Jesus — can do to stop her) and that means more money in the pockets of the racketeers (read: Apple). But, no matter how you slice it, a 30 second clip of “Fergilicious” isn’t a ringtone; it’s a travesty.
Tags: iPhone