An Ultimately Flimsy Explanation for My General Internet Suckiness
I try to keep this as impersonal as possible around here, generally on account of my being too sexy for your brains, but I suppose I should at least partially explain why my postings have been more infrequently, as well as more crappy than usual (yes, that’s saying a lot).
As some of you know I quit my job towards the end of last year, partly because of my revelation that all the science I’d learned in my life was predicated on an easily disproved lie, and, due to a complex process of elimination based around what little skills I have, I decided to pursue a career in law.
Now, I know what you’re think, “but you’re so fucking stupid.”
Yes, this is true, and therefore I’ve recently started taking this hella lame LSAT prep course so I can actually weasel my way into law school. In light of my somewhat lackluster GPA — which is due to not only my totally bone-headed decision as a college freshman to choose out of the six available biology majors offered by the University of California at San Diego the objectively hardest of the majors (requiring a different set of courses than any of the other majors), but also to my even more bone-headed decision to get a goddamn minor in Spanish Literature (in spite of the fact that I sucked at foreign languages and never got better than a B in Spanish my entire freakin’ life) — and the fact that my parents don’t seem to realize just how dumb their idiot son really is (true statement made by my folks: “Don’t worry if you don’t get into a law school like Harvard or Stanford … (pause) … any of the top ten schools will be good enough.”) I’ve had to focus on this stupid LSAT class of mine, which has sucked what little brain cells I have away from my usual bitching and moaning about things. For example, I saw 21 last weekend and still haven’t been able to bitch and moan about it. Terrible.
I take another practice exam this weekend and I see really only two results: I do well and can relax about how I’m doing, or I do poorly and come to terms with my tiny intellect and cry. Either way, I’m planning to chill out afterwards (and hopefully see The Bank Job).
So, if you notice a dearth of blog posts during the next couple of weeks, please know that I’m probably ass deep in stupid LSAT practice questions. However, you’re more than welcome to email me, and/or call your aunt/uncle on the admissions board of one of the top 10 law schools in the country to hook my sorry-ass up. You know, whichever one is more convenient.
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