How can he possibly be “silent” when he’s carrying all that shit around?

The toy is either completely ridiculous or poop-your-pants awesome, depending on how you feel about excessive accessorization. I’m not a girl, so, yeah, it looks totally ridiculous. I was going to leave a comment myself, but nothing I could say is as funny (or insightful) as that.

The actual post and some of the other comments are pretty funny too. Someone even brings up Rob Liefeld, who for comic book fans demands laughter and ridicule and punching in the nuts. Awesome.

30 Rock‘s Dennis Duffy, explaining why his arrest on Dateline’s “To Catch a Predator” was unfounded. I’m pretty sure you could write a graduate thesis on that one quote.

30 Rock is probably the best show on TV right now.

Justin, in regards to my spiffy new emo glasses.

According to this film, in year 2001 we would have had manned voyages to Jupiter, a battle of wits with a sentient computer, and a quantum leap in human evolution. Instead we got the Mir Space Station falling from the sky, Windows XP, and Freddy Got Fingered. Apparently the lesson here is that sometimes it’s better when the movies get the facts all wrong.

I wish real life was historically inaccurate, too.

When I first got there, during rehearsals I was changing some of the lines a bit, and Wes Anderson pulled me aside and said, ‘Jason, uh, it took me four years to write this script, so could you please just try to do the words I wrote?’ After that I always just did the words.

I read that quote when it was first published in 1999, and I was reminded of it when I noticed that Jason Schwartzman co-wrote Wes Anderson’s The Darjeeling Limited. The irony is delightfully charming.

I haven’t been this disappointed in a film that I thought was about bowling since I saw “300.”

If I thought there would be as much nudity in The Other Boleyn Girl as there is in The Tudors I would totally go see it, but, sadly, I don’t think that’s the case. I guess between The Darjeeling Limited and Lost in Translation you’ve got pretty much full ass-coverage of both bowlin’ girls, so that’ll have to do.

For now.

The problem that we face in America is not a lack of good ideas — it’s that Washington has become a place where good ideas go to die.

I learned the hard way not to make fun of Washington DC in public, but that quote is just delightful. I have a soft spot for “place where things go to die” humor.

That said, this guy needs to learn when to take his applause and just stop talking. His victory speech was like a half hour long. What the dooce?! You sound good, dude, but not that good. You ain’t no Alec Guinness.

I just cant get over the fact that Manhattan was destroyed by a soft-shell crab.

I love my family.

I think Sony would be moving a hell of a lot more units if the thing did actually grill sandwiches. That would be awesome.

The freest women in the world are the women of Iran.

This guy needs his own HBO comedy special.

In “honor” of what seems to be all-day coverage of Ahmadinejad on C-SPAN2, I give you this “get your war on” comic.

Incidentally, I made the same joke, only mine isn’t nearly as funny.